Weekend Update

This was another busy weekend full of surprises.  On Saturday Lucy invited me out.  I thought she said that she had some friends who wanted to invite me over for lunch.  Even though it wasn’t my day to shower, I washed my hair and made sure I had my most clean outfit on. I carried a box of American chocolates with me as a hostess gift.  I was nervous because this was the first time I had been invited into someone’s home for a meal, and so I was a bit early (I know, shocking!) to meet Lucy at the gate of our school. Of course she then called to say that she was stuck in traffic and instructed me to wait inside the guardroom because it was cold out. The guard beckoned me in. I was happy to wait inside, not only because of the temperature, but because the guards at Branch 1 don’t smoke and are very nice. There was a little boy working on homework at the desk, and at first he took no notice of me. I asked the guard, “Your son?” He understood and shook his head, no. He gestured at the building above and said, “Blah blah blah liaoshi blah.” I only understood one word, teacher, and so I guessed that the boy was the son of a teacher who was working in her classroom that day. I sat quietly and read for a few minutes, and then all of a sudden, a little, toy airplane-robot landed on my kindle screen. The boy and guard giggled. “Airplane!” I said as I held it up and “flew” it back to its owner. This opened up a whole fun conversation between the boy and me. We took turns teaching each other common words in English and Chinese through gestures and pictures. I learned xu, ping, li, and qiu, and he learned tree, apple, pear, and ball.  When we got to ball, the boy ran into the courtyard with a soccer ball, and the guard and I followed.  We all kicked the ball around for a few minutes. Then the guard went back inside and brought out a jump rope and a little toy that was shaped like an hourglass.  He balanced the toy on the jump rope and pulled back and forth on either end of it, making the toy spin. When the boy and I each tried, we couldn’t get it to work, but we laughed. We passed an hour this way. When Lucy finally arrived, I was having so much fun playing that I didn’t want to leave.

Lucy hurried me across the street to where a friend of hers and his son were waiting in his car. I climbed in, said hello, and then rode along as we drove for a long time.  We stopped at Lucy’s mother’s apartment building and picked up her niece, a first grader in one of my classes. She was very excited to see her English teacher in the car and wiggled and chatted and played.  We drove on for a while, finally arriving at the Museum of the September 18th Incident.  This was a surprise, but a good one. I had heard of this museum, but didn’t know if I’d get a chance to see it.

This museum was built to educate people about the conflict between China and Japan begun on September 18, 1931. This is the day when the Japanese began a brutal, fourteen-year occupation of northeastern China.  I learned so much!  Chinese history is long and complicated, and sadly, I know very little about it. The Japanese invaded during the very end of the Qing Dynasty and declared the area an independent nation called Manchukuo, but really it was ruled by Japan. The Chinese people living here were subject to horrible tortures at the hands of their occupiers, who used many of the same techniques Hitler did as he invaded European countries. They killed off the intelligentsia that would likely oppose them, they concentrated the population into smaller and smaller neighborhoods to more easily control it, they enforced slave labor at work camps and mines, and they tortured and performed genetic experiments on people caught working against them.  Chinese school children were taught Japanese language and literature, and businesses, banks, and local government offices were all controlled by Japan.  Many brave men and women resisted the occupation, and finally, with the help of the Communist army and the Russian army, the Japanese were expelled in 1945. It was a dark time in China’s history, but the museum was very well put-together and sensitive. The displays were labeled in Chinese, Japanese, and some English.

After the five of us had wandered through the museum, we went out to lunch and ate for nearly an hour and a half.  I have found that when someone invites you to eat in Shenyang, it’s a big deal, and it’s rude to rush or be too dainty. By the time we finished lunch it was nearly 4:00PM.  I was stuffed silly, very happy, and ready to head home. Lucy’s friend dropped us off at her mother’s house.  I thought Lucy was going to drive me home from there, and so I gave my chocolates to her friend and thanked him for driving us to the museum and for lunch. Instead of walking to her car, she took me upstairs to her parents’ home. I was warmly greeted, given slippers to change into and offered the best seat in the house.  Immediately, Lucy’s mom brought out a platter of fruit and cups of steaming-hot water in smudged, dirty glasses. She urged us to eat, eat, eat, and then went into the kitchen to make dinner for us. Oh, no! I had just finished this huge lunch and felt very full, I couldn’t eat the fruit because it was still glistening wet with tap water, I was thirsty, but I was grossed-out by the particles and oily fingerprints on the glass, and I had given away my hostess gift to Lucy’s friend! Lucy urged me to eat, eat, eat! I tried to explain that I was too full to eat anything, but I think she thought I was being rude. To make me more comfortable, she turned on the television to the English news station, and we watched it together with her niece. Her father came in and out of the room and urged me to eat, eat, eat! I refused, as politely as I could. The blaring TV was running the same story about the Chinese army’s efforts to help Japan recover after the earthquake and tsunami over and over. I tried to get Lucy’s niece to draw a picture or read a book with me, but she was too shy and too hyper. I tried to talk to Lucy, but she was having a nice time trying to interpret the news story on TV. A very uncomfortable hour and a half passed, when Lucy’s sister-in-law arrived home. She was very nice, but after urging me to eat, eat, eat!, just sat down to look at the television with us. Another thirty minutes passed, and Lucy’s brother came home. He sat to watch English television, too.  At this point I was pretty miserable. Dinner took another half and hour to prepare, and so by the time we sat down to eat, I could. Thank goodness. The food was delicious, but there were two dishes that were salads made of raw veggies. I had to find a way to politely decline tasting them. I tried to explain to Lucy that my body was not used to the water here, and that it wasn’t good for me to eat things that weren’t fully cooked, but she didn’t understand. So, I just had to say no. After dinner, we sat around the table, and everyone took turns asking me about life in America. This was much more fun than watching TV in the uncomfortable living room. Everyone was warm and pleasant, and Lucy was an excellent interpreter. As Lucy’s mom cleaned up the dishes, we all went back to the TV. This time Lucy’s niece chose the program – a cartoon featuring the animals of the Chinese zodiac. Finally it was time to leave, and Lucy’s husband came to pick us up in his car. They dropped me off in front of the gate to my building, and I said good night and thanked Lucy for spending the whole day with me.  It was so late that I was worried Vicky’s family had gone to bed. Fortunately, they hadn’t. I had made it home just in time.

On Sunday I spent the day with Eva, the head of the English department, and her family.  She and her husband Jack took me to the Imperial Palace Museum.  The Imperial Palace in Shenyang is a huge, spectacular palace that was built by Nurhachi, the father of the first Qing emperor, in 1624. It covers nearly eighteen acres and blends Manchu, Han, Mongol, and Tibetan architectural styles. The palace has dozens and dozens of pavilions, temples, halls, and houses, most of which are constructed of stone and decorated with elaborate tile work and paint. The buildings are organized around courtyards with beautiful stone pathways and gazebos. Eva and Jack lead me from place to place, trying to explain each part.  Some of the buildings were closed, but many were open and housed exhibits about Qing court life or artifacts.  One hall was full of incredible treasures from the Qing period like translucent porcelain teapots, cloisonné enamel burners, and carved jade vases. Another hall had a dissected palace wall to show the layers of stone masonry and plaster. Others had weapons, carriages, litters, cooking utensils, religious artifacts, clothing, and books. Some original furniture was on display too. We could peek into Nurhachi’s library to see his desk and reading chair, into the first concubine’s receiving room to see the colorful wall hangings and statues, and of course, into the throne room to see the throne!

Society during the Qing period was feudal, and the second emperor is famous for organizing his court under eight banners. He delegated certain powers and responsibilities to eight royal families, each with its own banner. This organization is reflected in the way the main part of the palace is organized.  The emperor’s throne room is at the very top of a hill, with a long, wide path leading up to it. This path would have been used for processions during ceremonies and celebrations. On either side of the path are five pavilions.  The two nearest the emperor’s throne room belonged to a prince, each in charge of four banners. Then there is a pavilion for the head of each banner. Jack told me that this formation was typical of the way Manchu army officers would have set up tents at camp. Even the shape of the emperor’s throne room is reminiscent of a tent.

We spent the entire morning wandering through the palace museum; I learned a bit of Chinese history, and Eva and Jack practiced their English.  When we had seen everything, we walked to Eva’s parents’ apartment for lunch. It was near the palace, but in a very old building. Eva warned me that it wasn’t big or fancy, and she was right. In fact, the apartment was very small and unlike any I’d ever been in before.  Besides the kitchen there was no common space, just a hallway, a small bathroom, and two bedrooms – one for each of her parents. There were no rugs on the concrete floors. Lines of wet laundry were strung across the tiny hall. I was invited to sit and relax on the bed in Eva’s mother’s room while lunch was being set out. Besides a photo of Eva in her bridal gown taped to the cracking plaster wall, there were no decorations. The furniture was old, and the room was filled with clutter. Eva sat with me and explained that her parents were going to have to move to a new apartment in June. The city was taking down several buildings in the neighborhood to redevelop the land. Lunch was announced almost immediately, and we moved into Eva’s father’s bedroom, where a feast was set out on his mahjong table. There were plates of spicy prawns, scrambled eggs and leeks, stir-fried vegetables and mushrooms, steamed dumplings, sausages, and peanuts. Eva’s eighty-year-old grandfather had taken a bus for nearly an hour to join us for lunch. He was a little boy during the Japanese occupation of this region and still knew how to speak some Japanese. It was so interesting to meet someone who had lived through the history I had just learned about at the museum the day before. The family was very friendly, and we had fun talking as we ate the delicious food. Eva’s father is a retired policeman and a real character.  He made jokes, teased his wife about her cooking, and chain-smoked the whole time. Eva’s mom joked right back and made sure that my plate stayed full. This lunch, as all of the others I’ve had since I’ve been here, took a long time, but it passed very quickly.  After we were all full, we sat around the table for another hour and a half. The family wanted to know all about me and my life back home.  They asked how much things cost, how much money I earn, what my husband does and how much he makes, what kind of a car I drive, what my apartment was worth, etc. We talked about American weddings and how they are different than Chinese weddings.  Eva’s mother seemed worried that I would unfairly judge her small home, and kept asking Eva to explain that they were “common” people and that things in China were very expensive. It was hard for the family to save for luxuries. I tried to explain that many Americans feel the same way, and that there is a huge spectrum of wealth and poverty in my country.  They were very surprised to learn that there were homeless beggars in Atlanta panhandling just a few blocks from some of the most prestigious addresses in the city. Still, Eva insisted, the quality of life must be better in the U.S. than in China, and she is right.  I think that most people here are working hard to make ends meet and must live very, very modestly.

After our lunch conversation was finished, I was invited to sit in Eva’s mother’s room again as the dishes were cleared. Eva’s mother joined us and showed me pictures of her family from a photo album.  She is very proud of her only child.  I got to see photos of parties, weddings, smiling babies, and kids on bikes. Even though we couldn’t talk to each other very well, I had a very nice time learning about her family. When it was time to go, she brought me a bag of dried mushrooms, noodles, and packets of MSG (“spices,” she said), for me to take home so that I could cook Chinese food for my husband. Then she pressed a plump, little clementine into my hand and waved good-bye.  I think that it was a big deal to her to have me in her home, and I was felt very humbled and honored.

Eva walked me out, and we went down the street and caught the bus back to Vicky’s apartment. I’d not yet been on a Shenyang bus, and it was very crowded. I have not felt unsafe at all here, but I did keep my purse wrapped in my arms in front of me. I skipped dinner at Vicky’s that night because I was too full, and enjoyed my clementine instead. I felt very tired, but I think that getting to spend some time in real Chinese homes was a good learning experience for me. I feel that I have made life-long friends with Eva and Lucy, and I hope that one day I can return the generosity they have shown me.